Take a Deep Breathe

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I need to figure shit out.  I’m sick and tired of feeling fat, ugly and lousy.

I’m just done thinking about how I’ve failed at every moment of the day.  The entire time I’m awake, all I can think of is how I’m gaining weight and how terrible I look.  I think AT EVERY MOMENT of my life about what I could do, what I should do, what I will do and what I won’t do.

I’M SICK OF IT.

I need to start now.  I need to stop ordering pizza cause it’s hot out and I don’t want to cook (last night).  I need to stop going for frozen yogurt because one of my room mate’s suggested it and I had recently read a review of it (Saturday).  I need to stop worrying about what other people are doing and just worry about me.  I need to make a choice.  Be fat and stop worrying about it or do something to fix it. 

In other words, put up or get up.

I’m going back to Weight Watchers.  I’m going back to Weight Watchers this week.  I will post my weigh in results and take some progress pictures.  I’m going to stick this out, dammit.  I want to be in control of me and my choices again because I cannot see my weight start with a “2” again.  I just can’t.  I worked so hard!  I can’t let it all be in vain.

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