I weighed myself this morning, as my official starting weight. I want to get back to my goal, or at least back to that goal “feeling”.
I don’t mind sharing how much I weigh – as of this morning, I am 174.6 lbs.
That means that since I stopped weighing in publically on my blog, I’ve gained almost 20 lbs.
It’s not the end of the world but it’s still not the greatest feeling. I liked the way my body felt at 155 lbs. I felt healthy! I felt invincible!
But the thing is, I’m pretty sure that the feeling of invincibility and health had nothing to do with what I weighed. It was a state of mind! I felt like a champion because I was working on something, I was accomplishing my goals and I was kicking ass at it. I think that’s why I’ve been basically at this weight since last Christmas.
It’s not about the twenty pounds. I’ve already done this. I’ve already lost weight and I’ve already been good at it.
My problem is, what now? What is my next step?
I feel like I can’t figure it out. The people who manage to keep their weight off seem to have to find a focus other than weight loss. The issue is that I have no idea what I want to make MY focus.
Really, I’d like my focus to be my life. Why is that so hard?